Pain Is Reborn When An Ex Finds A New Match

Every breakup of a relationship is usually accompanied by pain, to a greater or lesser degree, by a part or both. Ending a relationship in which you have deposited your expectations and dreams is not pleasant for anyone. Well, after the convenient mourning stage, it doesn’t end here. When you find out that your ex is already heart occupied, everything can fall apart again.

If this happens shortly after the end of the relationship, it tends to bother even more. Our minds are covered with thoughts of all kinds, such as the possibility that they betrayed us or the sadness of considering that perhaps they didn’t love us as much as we thought we saw in their gestures.

After this downpour of negative thinking comes an inner feeling out of fear that our ex has found someone, but we haven’t. We suddenly feel old and desperate for the idea of ​​being alone. He did it, but we are not yet ready to start a new relationship. Maybe so, but we decided not to do it so as not to close the door on a possible reconciliation.

I feel it still belongs to me

We refer to the possibility of feeling bad when we find out that our ex already has a new date, while we haven’t. However, what if we also have a new partner? Why do we get these jealousies, all of them the result of finding that person’s heart occupied again?

Although you might want to believe you’re past the breakup, sometimes it doesn’t work that way. We lie to ourselves, we intrude into new relationships when, in fact, we remain “hooked” to our previous partner. We are not talking about love, but an inertia that makes us believe that the other person still belongs to us.

In the society we live in, relationships continue to have a certain meaning of ownership. We believe our mate is our property. This makes us not see it as a person, but as a territory that we have to defend in order not to lose it and so that no one will steal it from us.

This rather distorted conception revives this feeling of association when it’s all over. There is no love, there is no longer any of that. However, we turn into blind people who get carried away by a false belief that our ex can’t be with anyone else. This fact bothers us, makes us angry. It’s ours, just ours. The person you’re with now is a usurper.

my ex keeps hurting me

Not really. Your ex doesn’t keep hurting you, you’re doing it yourself. You feel hurt because you weren’t chosen, because you start to compare yourself to the person he’s with now… You notice your insecurity mixed with anger and pain. A tangle of emotions that confuse him. It is necessary to put an end to this.

• Never compare : “your partner is younger, prettier, smarter”… Enough! Comparisons always hurt and don’t solve anything. That person will also have his faults and you have a thousand and one virtues. Stop getting hurt for free.
• Don’t be selfish : think of that feeling of possession that is so rooted and so selfish that it prevents us from truly loving. Now is the time to learn from this and realize that even though love is over you are lusting after your ex’s situation.

• “One nail doesn’t take another nail” : don’t think now about going out with someone to feel better about yourself and so that your ex has the same feelings as you. For starters, it’s not okay to use people for these purposes, and you may not even be able to make your ex jealous of your situation and angry.

Remember that love is not what we were taught. Maybe you’re still in love with your ex, but think that when you really love someone the only thing you want is their happiness, even if it’s not you. Turning the page is difficult, but it is also an opportunity to learn and gain confidence.

Your ex was a very important part of your life, but now he must go his way out of the same fear that you have to continue your own. Stop being stuck in a relationship that has already ended. It’s time to look ahead. Are you ready to start again?