Use The Past As A Springboard, Not A Sofa

It may be that someone has done us a lot of harm, or that we have become disillusioned, it may be that the circumstances were not really what we expected them to be in the past. A mistake we didn’t accept or behavior we didn’t expect can build chains in ourselves, causing us to fall prey to our own circumstances.

The past can weigh, it can even generate great suffering every time we remember it.  Looking back or living constantly remembering what happened, without learning anything from it, binds us to regret, guilt and even criticism, not allowing us to move forward.

the currents of the past

There are people who have their lives stuck in a moment of success or a previous experience of suffering.  They live as if that moment had never ended and they infect their entire present with it, remembering once in a while what happened.

Living thinking about what happened does not add up, nor does it calm our feelings.  It simply transports us to a moment in which we are immersed and infected by its sensations. This happens with both positive and negative memories. We cannot depend on it, as we will be deceiving ourselves. Staying in the past prevents us from growing and seeing our possibilities for change.

If we settle on the couch of  “I’ve tried it once and I didn’t have good results” , “falling in love brought me more suffering than joy”, “trusting doesn’t do any good, because in the end everyone is related by interest” ,  we’ll be in the waiting room of our own lives, as mere spectators of what happens around us.  With this attitude, we chose to be the supporting character in our film, at the mercy of others and circumstances.

Break the ties of the past

Any experience or situation is seen through the eyes of the past, giving it a meaning in relation to what has been experienced. Our previous experiences mark our present and our future, and we cannot prevent this from happening.

However,  everything depends on whether our relationship with the past is mediated by chains that bind us or by springboards that propel us forward  thanks to our learning.

If you use the past as a couch, settling into your problems, your failed attempts at success, or the  open wounds  of your relationships, you can get caught up  in all the ties that keep you from moving forward. Although the past is successfully marked, the same formulas don’t always work.

If, on the contrary, your past is used as a teacher with whom you learn with mistakes and virtues, serving as a conductor, you may be able to continue developing all your potential. The past can hurt and trap us, we can stay with it, run away or learn from its teachings. So, somehow, we are the ones who ultimately choose.

• If we remain in the past, we will deceive ourselves  and create rigid chains that will impede our own growth, condemning us through guilt, criticism or contempt.

• If we run away from what we live, we will end up creating a void that will be filled by our fears and insecurities.
• If we decide to learn from the past, we will face it first, and then we will be willing to take the juice from each of the learnings that the past can provide. We will break the chains and build the momentum needed to keep moving forward.

Build the springboard that will propel you to your dreams

The springboard to our dreams is built by facing the past with the attitude of wanting to learn from what was lived. Rather than complaining, feeling guilty, or feeling resentful about your last relationship, your failed attempts, or a disappointment in the behavior of a friend of yours, reflect on what you can learn from it.

This, which seems to be so simple to read, leads to an awareness and a desire to grow, together with the commitment not to hover on the surface of experiences.

How can learning to deal with your experiences help you in your daily life? How do you relate to building the trampoline that will allow you to achieve whatever you want? Very simple:  our personal growth is totally connected with the relationship that the past has with our daily ones.

Let’s think for a moment: if I learn to deal with people around me, with issues in my work or with my own emotions thanks to past experiences, this will allow me to focus more clearly all my energies on get what I want by building this springboard springboard.

Otherwise, we could just stick with what we already know or already live, fueling a danger. The comfort of the sofa, of the known, of your comfort zone, is extremely attractive and peaceful, even if it has a bit of suffering. What is really scary is the risk involved with diving into the unknown…  But, how to continue growing and learning?