What Is The Best Kind Of Love?

Have you ever wondered what the best kind of love is? Are there different ways to love? Maybe not or maybe yes. The truth is that we love at different times, and depending on how we are, feelings and emotions change.

The English statesman Benjamin Disraeli said that “the magic of first love is in ignoring that it may end one day” . It is very likely that he was right. Who hasn’t lived that first love in which the simple contact with a loved one seemed to burn the skin with burning passion every second?

However, despite the romanticism in which culture and customs make us believe about the magic of first love, it seems that it is not the best. Or so some experts say.

Are there different types of love? Which one is the best?

According to psychologists Cristina Callao and Robert Epstein, there are different types of love. In fact, despite the cultural heritage of passionate love, the reality is very different. What we read in novels is a false idealization of love.

The psychologists mentioned above try to question this idea of ​​half an orange, where we need the other to feel complete. However, Callao believes that this option totally nullifies one of the partners, because he will lose his essence and his individuality.

The truth is that the strength of adolescence makes us live a passionate and unforgettable first love, and we cannot see if there are better options. In this way, the young couple feels happy and fulfilled, and any separation makes them deeply unhappy. It seems that this is not the most valid option.

However, the human brain tends to idealize everything that produces nostalgia. A famous saying that exemplifies this phrase is that “every time spent was better”. However, it doesn’t seem true. The truth is that the passionate loves of youth are often very painful as a result of the couple’s lack of serenity and security.

What is the best kind of love? According to experts, mature love

Experts consider mature love to be the best kind of love.

Why? For several reasons:

– Mature love comes when we are more experienced people, with clearer ideas.

– Mature love arrives impregnated with a touch of security and serenity that every human being needs.

– The affective and emotional health of a mature love is much more productive.

– It is a form of love that brings benefits at an emotional, individual and couple level.

It is evident that few poets have praised mature love, perhaps because it lacks the intensity of the feelings of a youthful passion. However, the bond created between the partners is based on companionship and trust rather than emotional intensity.

“In the beginning, all thoughts belong to love. Afterwards, all love belongs to thoughts.”
– Albert Einstein –

the danger of romantic love

Current society and popular culture have instilled in us a certain proximity to romantic love. Many dream of this deep and intense love that will change their lives. However, in most cases, it won’t be for the better.

The idealization of romantic love prevents us from seeing reality as it is. As a result, it is very difficult for many people to let go of toxic, tumultuous, and painful relationships. According to Epstein, we learn love in a very unrealistic way, we learn an idea of ​​love inaccessible to mere mortals. On the other hand, the programming made since our childhood is so strong that we rarely don’t make the mistake of looking for a “movie love”.

However, the idealization patterns of love can change. Although attitudes are implicit in our brain, the power to change this configuration is in “our hands”. The learning process that begins with first romantic love can be used as an evolution to find more mature, sane, and serene loves.

“Love is a friendship with erotic moments”.
– Antonio Gala –

To conclude, psychologists recommend prioritizing feelings of attraction, respect, and appreciation. Honest, understanding, good-natured people who aren’t constantly on the defensive can have longer-lasting, sincere, and happier relationships.